"...or Bust."

As much as we thought we were headed to the Deep South, the Lord's providence ushered us into the clear knowledge that this was not where we were called to be. It was a curious affair, to say the least. But it is over and it is good. We continue to hold Chamberlain-Hunt Academy and all of its staff in the highest regard as we pray for their success in ministering to the lost.

One of the most cherished by-products of this "almost-move" has been the outpouring of love and support from so many here in Gainesville. It is overwhelming to feel so loved. We are glad to remain a part of that fellowship until and if the Lord sees fit for us to "definitely-move".

One of the more difficult by-products has been my own glaring perspective of dependence on a Holy God, or a lack thereof. I have reflected on my very real dependence of Him while contemplating a life-altering decision, especially one that involved such a worthy cause as ministry. I had rich times in God's Word and in prayer. My heart was softer towards others and my conversations were generally more Christ-centered about this "epic event" for me. I was convinced that I was about to leave my family, friends, church and home to venture in to many unknowns for the Gospel's sake. I was excited and sad all at the same time, but I had an unwavering trust in God's will for us.

And then, just as suddenly as the opportunity had presented itself to us, it was over. We knew that we weren't going. We just knew that it wasn't right. Disappointment set in along with confusion and questions. How could we have felt so led by the Lord to then realize, very clearly in our spirits, that this was as far as He would lead and no further? And the bigger question for me was why I now felt so independent of His care? Why does it take so much for me to recognize my need of a Savior for all things and why does it take so little for me to forget?

And then I am reminded that I had it all wrong in the first place. He did not discontinue to lead, he simply changed directions. And when I remember this, I remember who I am and who He is and although I do not possess the road map for the future, I can trust that He is good and that He will lead me well. Praise God!

He leadeth me, O blessèd thought!
O words with heav’nly comfort fraught!
Whate’er I do, where’er I be
Still ’tis God’s hand that leadeth me.

Refrain
He leadeth me, He leadeth me,
By His own hand He leadeth me;
His faithful follower I would be,
For by His hand He leadeth me.

Sometimes mid scenes of deepest gloom,
Sometimes where Eden’s bowers bloom,
By waters still, over troubled sea,
Still ’tis His hand that leadeth me.

Refrain

Lord, I would place my hand in Thine,
Nor ever murmur nor repine;
Content, whatever lot I see,
Since ’tis my God that leadeth me.

Refrain

And when my task on earth is done,
When by Thy grace the vict’ry’s won,
E’en death’s cold wave I will not flee,
Since God through Jordan leadeth me.

Refrain

-Joseph H. Gilmore, 1862